The Gift of Life

The little girl turned five months last Saturday. Has it really been five months now since she was born into this world?

She’s grown up a lot in that short span of time.

• She can roll over on to her tummy very easily, with little or no help from us. Getting back to lie on her back is still a bit more difficult for her.
• She is more vocal than ever. By this I mean, she loves to shout and scream and make all kinds of noise. I suppose she is into exploring sounds these days.
• Aside from sound, Erin is very much into exploring through touch. She will grab anything placed near her and bring them to her mouth. I think this is because she may also be teething.
• Her hair is getting pretty long, and therefore, unruly. Those Goody barrettes are the greatest!
• Erin is more sociable as well. By just throwing her a big smile, she will also do the same. Sometimes, we are rewarded with giggles.
• She’s starting to sleep better too, especially at night. Thank God! No need to explain this one.
• Erin’s more aware of her surroundings now. She knows when I’ve left the room. Sometimes I think she’s starting to develop separation anxiety.

Babies grow up so fast! They are amazing, I tell you. They can surprise you every now and then. More often than not, these surprises are just a delight.

I’m tired. As in, dead tired. If you have been reading my previous posts, you’ll know why. Being a new mom to a young little baby does not actually mean I’m all blissed out by it. Since not all babies are the same (as with us adults), not all families get to sleep peacefully at night. And we are one them.

It’s been almost five months now since I’ve had a decent sleep. By this I mean at least 8 hours of uninterrupted shut-eye. I’ve learned to be more awake instead because of Erin’s erratic sleep pattern. During those rare instances when she does sleep well, I find myself wide awake, my entire body tense with absolutely random thoughts racing in my head. Maybe I am too tired to even sleep!

I have to give credit to J though. J can be quite a lifesaver when we’re having another sleepless night episode. He takes charge of Erin and orders me to get some rest. He has gone from the clueless father who can barely hold her daughter because he is afraid he’ll squish her tiny body to the daddy that can actually settle his kid and even get her to sleep when I can’t. Yes, we are the ultimate tag team!

Anyway, I digress. Last Saturday night was one the worst because Erin was having trouble sleeping. Being puyat from Friday’s “bout” (and from other nights), I just broke into tears in the midst of it all. J came in and took charge. It was 1:30 AM when I slept and woke up at around 5:30. I got up and saw Erin fast asleep on J’s lap, while he was surfing the net to keep himself awake. He told me that he could still take care of Erin until 7AM just so I could rest. Awww… I took Erin from him and went to bed and just allowed him to sleep until noon.

Thank God for wonderful and thoughtful husbands! I cannot imagine new mothers who do not have support systems in times like these. No wonder postnatal depression is so common here as most parents in first world countries like here are on their own.

Oh boy, it’s the last month before the “-ber” months start to kick in. I can hardly believe winter is already over in another four weeks, which, by the way, is getting to be more obvious because of the less cooler temps these past few days. In no time, I can say goodbye to my fleece and wool outfits (and hopefully to Erin’s eczema as well!) and welcome good old cotton back into the wardrobe. It’s no secret the cold has not been a good friend to the family so I am just giddy at the thought of Spring in the not so distant future.

-o-

With Erin getting bigger by the day, she is quickly turning into a Daddy’s girl with all her cute antics. J is so smitten with the little girl (not that he wasn’t before. it’s more pronounced now!) that he vehemently expressed that he cannot go on without her for three months. You see, we have been slowly planning our loooong holiday next year after Erin turns one. The original plan was to go home to the Philippines in April 2008, with J staying for two months while Erin and I stay back until the end of August. Now, we have both decided (yes, after a bit of compromising because I really would have wanted a longer break) to just start our holiday by the end of May (in time for Erin’s cousin Pablo’s 1st birthday), with J going back in July and Erin and me by the end of August. As of this writing, all is still in the planning stage (i.e., no booked flights yet so no specific dates to speak of) but one thing I know for sure is that we are definitely going home for a much needed vacation. I can hardly wait!